Showing some extra LOVE for my mum on Father's day!

Hey Blog Readers! 

So as I write this it's still Sunday June 21st here in LA which, as we all know, is 'Father's day'. SO all day I've been seeing some lovely posts from people for their fathers on social media and just now an advert for father's day came up on my YouTube which is what inspired me to write this blog post. It was a truly lovely advert which basically displayed the excitement different dads had when their girlfriend/wife broke the news that she was pregnant and they were going to have a baby - some were totally overwhelmed while others were literally moved to tears.. it was really cute! but it made me think of my mum and the total lack of support,help, happiness or encouragement that she was given when having me and it made me really sad... not for me but for my mum! I cannot stress what a wonderful human my mum is (yes I realise I'm biased) but genuinely her heart is so pure and she is simply a truly good person with a heart of gold! she is the most selfless person I know and to be fair I have always really appreciated her and we are, and have always been, ridiculously close but I guess moving so far away has given me more time to actually stop and think about everything she has gone through and what an amazing mother, father, every other relative and friend all in one she has been to me!

Yesterday when I was in the gym the 2002 movie 'Enough' starring Jennifer Lopez was playing and while I had seen it in passing (not paying much attention to it) before, this time it caught my eye, and while it is fictional and it does get a bit ott towards the end it really made me think of my mum and her life with my sister while she was pregnant with me. I won't get into the past too much but all I'll say is when you live through something and through struggle that's what you know..so as the child you just think it is normal but now as an adult I realise how much my mum sacrificed for me and my sister and how much of herself she gave to us. Despite unfortunate situations (I do know there's worse btw) I really never went without anything. Here's one example of many: I remember being in town with my mum and she brought a top for herself (a very rare occasion btw-she never shopped for herself) however I then had a dentist check-up that ended up being more than a check-up so she returned the top she had just brought so that she could pay for me to go to the dentist. This was not an expensive top, my dentist bill wasn't expensive and wasn't urgent either but as a struggling single mother it was the top or the dentist and of course there was no doubt it was going to be the dentist. When I was a teenager she practically stalked me to make sure I wasn't getting myself in danger or into any trouble and while it was so annoying at the time now I think it just showed how much she cared! This woman had a radar which meant I never lied to her about anything because I knew I would get caught if I did so it kept open communication between us even through the stroppy-difficult-teenage years.

I've said before on social media how much it physically, emotionally and mentally pains me living so far away from the two closest people to me - my mum and my sister! but I constantly re-assure myself that I must live my life for me because that's the only life I have!
It actually amazes me to think of how far my small family has come when we literally came from a tough start. I'm not suggesting we have everything now - but we have our health, our happiness, I've a bachelor of education degree and I'm chasing my dreams living in the la-la-land of dreams. My sister is beyond intelligent and currently studying for her Doctorate which she was hand picked to do out of hundreds of people. I think it's safe to say my mum did a pretty good job all on her own and our family could not be any closer. I can't wait for the day when I am able to pay my mum back 10 fold!

me and my sister

me and my sister :)

So to you mum: I love you so much words could never describe! I look up to you in every way - I truly believe you are wonderful and beyond amazing! and in the words of Tupac 'You ARE Appreciated"!x!
I look forward to writing our book ;) haha.

To anyone who doesn't have a dad on father's day, who's dad isn't/wasn't great or who doesn't have parents or is in some other un-ordianry situation - I send you so much love and I hope father's day didn't make you feel down. Know that if you have one good person in your life then you are blessed!x! if you don't have that person yet then be that person for yourself-show yourself some TLC, be the best you and you will attract good people and become that person for your future family and friends.

HAPPY Father's day to all the amazing dad's that are out there! and Happy father's day to all the single mum's or granny/grandad's or anyone else who raised a child - we appreciate your greatness!

Lots of Love, 

Shahira Xo

If your company would like a review or specific blog-post on a product, treatment, service or any other item to appear on www.shahirabarry.com email info@shahirabarry.com with the details.

Everything happens for a reason???

Hey Blog Readers!

Random thoughts for you...

Do you ever look back at previous situations and just think as horrible as that was if that didn't happen to me, I didn't go through that, that person didn't treat me that way etc.. then I wouldn't be where I am today? I wouldn't have learnt what I now know and I wouldn't be the person I am...

I always believed that everything happened for a reason until I reached 18 and that's when I experienced my first real loss of a loved one.. that mind-frame can not possibly be put onto such a loss and it makes you question everything you believed before. So with the exception of loosing someone, horrible illnesses or accidents - take all of them out of the equation because I simply cannot include them. Lets just say when it comes to day to day life situations and experiences that you go through - whether bad or good I, at least, truly feel that they happen for a reason!

When you are in the middle of a negative situation it can be so hard to see beyond it, it can be so difficult to see what good will come of it.. but put it this way: think of something you went through; perhaps a fall out with friends: yes at the time it felt horrible but then a few months later look back at the situation - see where you are now and think would you be the same if that hadn't happened.. would you be in the same place? think of a relationship that went wrong and resulted in a nasty break-up.. would you have met the person you're now with? or if you have yet to meet someone would you have discovered yourself that little bit more the way you have - would you be who you are today?

Now I'm not saying that if you go around acting like a 'dick' and being nasty to your friends (for e.g.) (you being the cause of the fall out) that it's right to think "oh well everything happens for a reason, frig'apologizing, I'll learn from this in a few months" ha, no! if you think that's what I'm trying to say then you have me completely wrong! What I' trying to say is if you apply "everything happens for a reason" and think of situations where it has already come into play for you then life becomes easier and difficult situations become a little easier to handle. The pain is a lot less than if you didn't apply this idea and took a "woe is me" approach.

I have been thinking about this a lot lately... in terms of the things that have led me to this point in my life and the person who I am today! Granted I have not yet accomplished all of my goals or dreams or done everything in life that I have ever wanted to do (I'm in my early 20's how could I have). Even when I do accomplish current goals/dreams I'm sure new ones will be set and it will be a never ending task until the day I am no longer here on this earth (what a scary thought that is) but I am very confident in the fact that I feel I am on the right track and I am exactly where I should be for this moment in my life. There is something very comforting about that feeling. Don't get me wrong I am impatient at times and I think - I should be doing this that and the other, why hasn't this happened yet etc... but all I can do is trust that I am where I am supposed to be, that everything does happen for a reason and that my life is perfectly imperfect :)

YOU are also exactly where you should be! and if you feel you are not, you still are, even if it's simply the time to make you think this is not "where I want to be", to realise that, and decide to make a change in your life. If you are unhappy you can change it around and take your life in another direction whatever right now may be saying to you it is still this moment in your life that has made you discover what you need to know for the future and your past experiences that have molded you into the person you are right now and taught you the lessons you were destined to learn.

Food for thought :) 

Lots of love,

Shahira xo 

If your company would like a review or specific blog-post on a product, treatment, service or any other item to appear on www.shahirabarry.com email info@shahirabarry.com with the details.