My Thoughts - Essena O'Neill 'Quitting Social Media!"

Hey Everyone!

So during the week the buzz word on social media was "Essena O'Neill" and "Quitting Social Media"... Yup, ironic that this idea of quitting social media was trending ON SOCIAL MEDIA..
Anyway - as someone who is on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, has a blog and is trying to build a YouTube channel.. I thought I would write (use social media, lol) to give my two cents on this idea and Essena's trending video...

If you haven't seen the video then watch it first so you have some clue about what I'm talking about...

Ok here's the thing...I personally had never heard of Essena O'Neill or seen any of her pictures/videos before this video went viral.. I know I saw many saying the same online... so in complete contradiction that shows the absolute power of social media! 

When I first watched the video I could relate to her message and what she was saying... I personally can, at times, find social media very draining! so I get it! A part of me was saying "good on you" and "you go girl!" as she did make some very good points.. I even shared the video on my facebook and said that I found it very interesting... because I did! 

The part that left me very confused was the end... the part where Essena says that as a result of quitting her job(social media) she will not be able to pay for her rent and she asks her followers to donate money to her via her new website... This left me with a bit of a weird feeling in my stomach, I almost felt like a bad person for feeling a little negative about that part and this young girl... You see the thing is, as far as I'm concerned, if you truly want to quit social media because you feel it is doing you personal damage (which I can understand why/how it could do that) surely you would just post the video and then delete all social media accounts? At 19 years old (Essena was just about to celebrate her 19th birthday the day after making this video) most normal teenagers don't have a career yet anyway... many have no idea what they are going to do with their life and most have little or no money to their name.. Therefore it would be my thinking that you would just do some soul searching, decide what it is you want to do, even move back in with family if you need to(if that's an option) and then go back out into the real world and get a regular job.. it may not be the fulfilling job that you want immediately but something to pay the bills until you decided what it is you do want to do and what is it that will make you HAPPY (because that's what's most important and again no rush as Essena is only 19).  

There is something in me that really does not agree with Essena asking her followers for money(for the reason she has given at least)because she alone has chosen not to have social media as her career any longer and that was solely her choice. Not just that but money is made off of ad-sense and clicks on both websites and YouTube (all be it a teeny tiny amount) but having a video that goes viral and creating a new website which has a lot of interest as a result will gain some revenue in itself (which totally goes against the idea of "quitting social media" btw anyway). 

Look... each to their own - it's an individual's choice whether they want to donate money to Essena or not and I am certainly not judge and jury over what's right or what's wrong in that case... or what people should or shouldn't do with their own money but it is my personal opinion that while the original message was a strong one, and I, personally, can relate to the message in many ways as I've said (some days more than others, ha.) and I'm also sure Essena means well in her message and feelings behind the whole thing (she may even feel a bit overwhelmed by the attention it has since received..?) I do however feel in my gut that the end part makes the video somewhat hypercritical.. 

Anyway, that's my opinion on Essena O'Neill's video... now my opinion on social media in general... 

There was a time when I thought I was a queen of networking and social media... for Ireland I was doing pretty well with regards to my online growth - facebook/twitter/my blog etc... however then two things happened 1) Instagram came a long and 2) I moved to Los Angeles... 

Both of these things combined made me feel a tad more negative toward social media as a whole and here's why... 

Because it became an uneven playing ground for work and work = money and money = surviving financially! 

I'm not talking about money made off of views, clicks or endorsements.. to me that would never amount to being a job (not on the small scale that I'm currently on anyway) but jobs with regards to modelling and acting which I am pursuing here in tinsel town! 

For example many vine stars are now landing movie roles... not for their love of acting or that they even had any interest in it before (don't get me wrong some have so there are exceptions) but simply because they have a large following they are handed it... tell that to an actor who moved here 5 years ago has worked their butt off to get into acting classes and workshops and lived off of very little in order to do so but when it comes down to the audition the vine star gets the job... that seems unfair?... because, basically, it is unfair! but that's life and that's the social media world that we live in. (I have met many of these actors)

I once read an article by the New York Post saying how in the world of modelling you need more than 10,000 Instagram followers to stand any chance of booking "the" job. And lets be real... 10,000 on Instagram is nothing these days when there are 'Instagram models' who were unknown but have carved a following of a million+ on their account. (To read that article click here) 

Fair enough.. when it comes to modelling the larger the following the easier it is for the company to promote the product (for eg) and the more attention it will receive and I totally understand that from a business point of view and if you have put genuine time and effort into building your Instagram and real people are genuinely interested in following you then that's amazing and you probably should get the job!! however where it becomes unfair is where fake followers come into account:  On Instagram, in particular, I would argue that there are so many fake followers everywhere you look...to me this is purely obvious based on the follows to likes/comments ratio.. I'm sorry, I realize that more people 'like' than comment on Instagram', but if you're picture has 2,000 likes and 4 comments I would call suspect on that one..
(the thing about fake followers is it attracts real ones because people think this person has a lot of followers so they must be worth following. Therefore i'd suggest we don't judge on numbers alone but on content and interest:)

What pisses me off is that numbers seem to matter so much so that someone with 100,000 fake followers would get a job over someone with 20,000 real ones? That just doesn't seem right...

BUT unfortunately It is a like game, it is a follow game and it is unfair and uneven. What hasn't been said  it that it is also a rich persons game... even if you're not paying for followers a picture of your Louboutin shoes placed perfectly on the seat of your expensive car or on your sparkling white rug will gain attention because Instagram is also a dream world where ordinary people aspire to have those Louboutin shoes, drive that car or go on that exclusive Bora Bora holiday! put up a picture of your hatch back and crocks and you won't be getting as much interest that's for sure!! (haha)

There is definitely a downside to social media: the above with regards to jobs (particularly in the entertainment industry) would be a huge one for me but also I can see Essena's point of view with regards to it not being "real life" and it playing havoc on people's self esteem... Perhaps a young girl who looks at the likes of Jen Selter and comes away from her phone feeling shit about her own body..social media can definitely do that...however, it could be said that they are the downsides to an otherwise positive platform because it can also do the complete opposite and inspire - be it fitness,lifestyle or something else: it may set another girl/boys dreams higher, it may inspire them to eat healthier, workout or to travel etc... and It may give people who never had a voice the chance to have one... 

I believe what is important is that when looking at social media nobody take it too seriously...A person is not defined by 'likes' and 'followers'..when judgement day comes and its all put in perspective what does that matter anyway? And definitely don't think your life is bad because your comparing it to that of someone you see on social media because you definitely don't see the half of it! Everyone wants to post their best pics, I don't think there is anything wrong with that, nobody is going to post pictures from the day they feel awful, haven't washed their hair in days and have been lazing around in sweats. I can give you a direct example: yesterday I was sick all day! I literally did not leave my house - I missed my audition due to a migraine, I also had bad cramps, was feeling homesick, lonely and extremely anxious..I didn't put on a spot of makeup or brush my hair, I ordered take out and ate fairly unhealthy: I felt horrendous on the inside and out and I cried a number of times (my hormones were all over the place to make things worse)... yet I also posted a "selfie" on Instagram that was taken about three days earlier - that selfie was not taken yesterday!! the last thing I wanted was any type of picture to be taken with how I was feeling yesterday but to the world or people who follow me on Instagram they probably thought that that picture was from yesterday and I had a much different type of day than I had in fact had! so there ya go! 

My advice to people trying to build their social media organically: 

• Post content you actually like and believe in e.g. don't post about any brand just because they ask you to: if you don't like the brand.. don't post about it: simple. 
• Don't compete with others on social media - no good can come of it and it's impossible in a world where a lot (not all) is contrived.
• Don't become consumed - it's true that it's not real life - make sure you are enjoying your real life first and foremost! 
• Use it as a form of self-expression! 
• Celebrate life - be proud of who you are and express the real you!!x!!
• Think of followers like friends... it's better to have one real one than a hundred fake ones :)

So to conclude: 

Social Media is Like Television, Stage, Radio or Magazines - There's really not a huge difference. It is basically "entertainment" so take it with a pinch of salt and ENJOY! 

Lots of Love, 

Shahira Xo

If your company would like a review or specific blog-post on a product, treatment, service or any other item to appear on www.shahirabarry.com email info@shahirabarry.com with the details.

When you lose your mojo... (Desire, Passion or Motivation!)

Hey Blog Readers!

Sorry for the lack of posts over the past while but this one is for me (to take my own advice) as much as it is for anyone else reading this who might need it!

Over the past couple of weeks I've really lacked energy, found myself beating myself up so to speak and just in general being a bit of a depressed head and lacking my mojo!

Why you ask? well to be honest I'm not entirely sure! As someone pursuing a career in entertainment the press coverage I had in the month of August could not have been any better - I was in everything from Cosmopolitan magazine to NOW!, Elite Daily and many more as well as multiple radio interviews even as far as Melbourne Australia! and opportunities coming in from Germany and India!(i did feel a bit overwhelmed to tell the truth) From the outside looking in you'd think my August was amazing and from that angle I guess it was! but I don't know what it was..maybe everyone has to crash at some stage but I definitely found myself crashing.. energy wise and positivity wise! both mentally and physically! SO I am trying to change it around starting fresh for the month of September!

I always saw September as a fake beginning of the year because it's not the new year but it is a time when we've been trained to start a new - start a new year in school/college, a new course, get back to work etc.. and even though we all complain about the summer being over I think there is a secret sense of happiness because as humans we need a routine and some organisation in our lives and I think many of us associate September with that (even if we change our minds and wish for summer in the months following).

First things first - It's important to assess why it is that you feel you've lost your mojo?!
For me I think it can simply be put down to my full steam a head, adrenaline filled, hectic year - moving country is not easy!! and there are daily challenges that you have to over come in order to survive! I have had a blessed year to say the least but it has also been one of the most challenging, draining and difficult obstacles I have ever faced. and I have faced it alone. It's been quite a while since I've seen my family now and there are no immediate plans for visits so that is very tough! Also living in LA and working in entertainment offers extreme highs but what goes up must come down and it cannot stay that way all of the time - regular life must commence!

I have suffered with anxiety for many years now and while initially my anxiety was high upon moving and the scariness that that offered..once I settled in it soon subsided and I almost felt I had cured myself of my anxiousness (I think I wrote a blog on it?) Anyway then Que the entrance of a psychotic nutter into my life and my anxiety reached the worst it's ever been... I finally removed myself from that situation a couple of months ago and to be honest I feel I've been suffering from perhaps a less extreme version of post traumatic stress ever since! There is no reason for it anymore - I'm away from the situation and life is good but I guess it's waves of anxiousness and it was so high it's taken a while to come back down! Hopefully now that I've assessed what may have been bothering me and what might have been going on I can now try to pick myself back up, grab my mojo back with both hands and get back in the race of life!

🙌🏻 only ever compete with yourself 🙌🏻 #motivation #life good night✨ 🌝✨

A video posted by Shahira (@shahirabarry) on Sep 5, 2015 at 12:59am PDT

Ask your self... why do you feel you've lost your mojo?
Is it because you were gong full steam ahead for too long? and not giving yourself a break?!
are you still interested in what it is your pursuing? or do you need to change it up?
are you bored? do you need to try something new?
are there legitimate reasons that have made you feel down and perhaps you haven't faced or over come them just yet?
Once you assess why it is you've been feeling the way you've been feeling you can work on putting it back together and starting again! regaining your positivity and your strive!

The Secret!
I very much believe in the secret aka the law of attraction! anyone who reads my blog regularly, keeps up with me on social media or knows me personally would know that! However-no matter how much you believe in submitting good energy and being positive we are all human and we are flawed! there are times when life for whatever reason, even a reason that doesn't make sense to others, can knock us down and we can get stuck in a rut and begin to work the secret against us.

So YEAH BABY here are my tips for those times in life when you feel you've lost your Mojo!

1) Re-evaluate, assess and get organised! As mentioned above once you figure out why you've lost your mojo you can begin to make moves to either get it back or change it! If you change it make sure you are definite that you no longer have a passion for what ever IT is and not that you are giving up when things get tough - everything worth achieving will have obstacles in the way - don't give up at the hurdle! Now it's time to get organised and put a plan in place! Having a daily routine is so important - it doesn't matter how much or little it is you have to do. Having a generally steady daily routine makes your mind so much clearer therefore giving you the space you need to concentrate and progress once again!

2) Get outside/change your environment! staring at concrete walls all the time won't help you to come up with new ideas or to become motivated once again - get outside! go for a walk, breath some fresh air! try something new! Your creativity will thank you for it!

3) Change Your Patterns Be brave! try out the for the weird class around the corner – give it a whirl. Go to the gym after work? Try pumping some iron before you get to the office. If you eat at the same restaurant for lunch all the time, walk a bit further to check out a new spot. See what happens by just sitting on the other side of your desk, looking at a different wall or out a window, bring your work outside-change up your perspective. It’s a variety of small improvements that will declutter your mind dramatically.

4) Change your attitude! If you'll believe it, you'll see it! if you can feel it you can achieve it! envision your finish line! imagine you already have it/you've reached your goal(whatever it may be) and then begin to work backwards to determine what you need to do to make that your reality! but always believe it is! Make lists, set a side some time in the day and make small goals for each stage! don't overwhelm your brain with too many tasks/goals at one time - simply start climbing the stairs, ticking off the tasks one step at a time!

5) To do list: Keep a list and change some priorities! (I'm not saying that if you have kids/wife/husband not to have them as your #1 priority) I'm talking about things/jobs/habits etc.. not necessarily relationships (although we'll get to that further down). If you have fitness goals and you find no time for them and yet seem to find time to sit down and watch coronation street every day at 7.30pm and get no personal gain or even enjoyment from watching but it's simply become a habit then change that!! leave Corry to the side and take that time to get some exercise in instead! Keep a calendar.. because your calendar does not lie about where your focus and priorities are, so make it clear that you value your own time for the categories you want to focus on.  Block out time for activities requiring your attention and adjust the rest of your day accordingly! Make time for what you need to do! 

6) Remember The people you surround yourself with heavily influence you. If you’re lacking motivation and feeling down on everything, it might be time to upgrade your sphere of influence. Negativity breeds negativity, but likewise with positivity, which is the good news!! Those closest to you should be the same people who bring out your best qualities, including your mojo for life’s adventures. You should lift each other higher rather than bring one another down! 

7) Change Your Thoughts:  “You are what you think about.”  Instead of thinking you “can’t do X” or “won’t be able to do Y,” think about your ability to do them: you could do X if…  Fill in the blank and then make it actionable. For example, thinking you’re “fat” doesn’t accomplish anything – even if it’s true. Instead, think, “my ideal body image would be…” and fill in the blank then work your butt off to get there! 

8) Give your body the fuel it needs! Eat healthy: fuel your bod with nutrients and get enough sleep!ZzZ! for our brain to be clear and functioning at it's best, our body needs to feel awake and at it's best! how can we expect to get things done and to have a clear mind if we are physically exhausted! On a personal level and note I'm over alcohol and have been for the longest time! It can be ok in moderation but personally I don't get any gain from drinking alcohol-all I get is a blurred mind and days of feeling sick, unmotivated and feeling sorry for myself...give me a hike and some outdoor activities any day! 

These changes aren't easy! but as Einstein said best... 

Finally..I often turn to THE Tube! (YouTube) - YouTube is great for helping you on just about anything! Need to know how to do a certain hairstyle - youtube it, need to know how to bake a cake - youtube it, need some tips on getting motivated... youtube it!! Below is one of my favorites! ENJOY!x!

Please Share/Let me know if you have any tips/tricks on getting your mojo back ;) 

As always you can follow me on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter and YouTube!x!

BTW if you missed my most recent YouTube video catch it below :) 

Lots of Love, 

Shahira Xo

If your company would like a review or specific blog-post on a product, treatment, service or any other item to appear on www.shahirabarry.com email info@shahirabarry.com with the details.

TODAY August 4th...I have been living in LA 1 YEAR!

Hey Blog Readers, 

TODAY August 4th marks my 1 YEAR anniversary since my move to Los Angeles!!! 

A year ago I wondered what life would be like today! would I still be here in the city of angels and how would the past 365 days have gone! So I thought I would reflect!

I did write about my move to LA with a post that was very popular back in March! So click here to give that a read if you missed it because I'll try not to repeat myself in this blog post! 

I don't really know where to begin... what a year! in one way it feels like I've done so much and been living here for so long but in another way it still feels so new and like I've only been here for a month or 2 max!!! I remember when I first arrived seriously questioning if I could in fact stay & live in this scary place??! I'd been in LA before so I had a very rose tinted view on it but now suddenly I was jumping when someone would walk up behind me on the street... Now with the prospect of living here it was a much more dangerous, big & scary place than I had remembered!! But somehow I overcame my fear & I did it! I've been here 1 year!!

I've definitely learnt an awful lot about life and I'm proud of myself! you don't even realise all the new information that's about to be thrown on you when you move country! every little thing is different! you have to get your social security card, your id, your new driving license(learn to drive automatic and on the other side of the road as well as navigating scary freeways), find somewhere to live without having credit history (extremely difficult), learn about doing your taxes and the new currency! as a budding actress learn all about SAG(screen actors guild) what it is, how to become eligible and how to join(had no clue coming from Ireland), buy furniture (every rental is unfurnished in LA=crazy!), move, decorate, buy/sell cars, deal with mechanics on your own! as well as the simple things...learn to cook(I'm getting there), do your laundry, find your way around!, socialize, meet new people every day, earn a living, learn the new culture(there is a difference!) and most importantly stay safe! It's all been a challenge!

 

With all that said it has been the best year of my life!!! However it hasn't been without it's difficulties so I would be lying if I didn't share them...

The hardest part.. 

• Buying my first car here: having had a second hand car for years at home I didn't think getting one in LA would be too difficult (they say "everyone" in LA drives (hence the traffic!) so there must be millions of good second hand cars right?).. how wrong I was! I brought a 2008 Chrysler (yup everyone told me not to buy an American brand car and to go with something Japanese but I didn't listen). I paid for it out rightly in cash from a dodgy dealer and immediately there were electrical problems with it (immediately as in the first day I drove it off the lot!) within a week the car started to break down and that led to months of constant car trouble! I was so afraid to drive it as it would cut out even on the freeway! luckily in January I managed to get myself a brand new car-which is beautiful and safe! but thousands of $$$ were wasted on that stupid Chrysler both between the purchase of the car and the money shoved into it for various repairs that didn't work! Lesson learned! 
• A bad roommate situation for a period of time: I won't delve into it because frankly it's not worth it and I don't want to dwell on such negativity! It was a difficult time: I would go to work happy and find myself in floods of tears on the way home. Never the less I got out of the situation, learnt some harsh lessons from it and things are now better than ever! 
• Home sickness! Being that all I wanted since my very first visit (2012) and my 3 month visit (in 2013) was to be living and working in LA it was a shock to me that homesickness hit me at all! It was very tough at the beginning and it can still be tough from time to time! anyone who know's me knows that me, my sister and mum are incredibly close and I've spoken on here numerous times about how much it physically pains me to be away from them! I also miss my pets and wish they were here with me but it would simply be too difficult for me to have them in LA at this point... maybe in the future.. you never know! 

• Loneliness at times: the majority of the time I'm incredibly busy with work but at times it can be lonely here! while I have met some great people here everyone is still a relatively new friend! It's not really the same as people you've known for years or have a million mutual friends in common if they're a new friend like it would be at home in Ireland. Also 99.9% of people I make friends with here live the #setlife and with that comes a difficulty to plan as you have to be able to drop everything at a moments notice for a booking or an audition-at least there's a mutual understanding but it can be hard to keep in touch! 

The good side! 

• I feel my career and dreams are going in the right direction! after all that's what I came here for and I have had a ridiculous amount of highs and been incredibly lucky so far! Sometimes I literally feel magic (I know that sounds silly) but the life I live today is chalk and cheese compared to the life I came from. Not that there was anything particularly wrong with my life at home in Ireland but sometimes I pinch myself at the amazing experiences I have had so far! I simply can't believe I'm experiencing them, if that makes sense! I'm not where I want to be just yet I haven't landed "the big role" or reached my goals but I definitely feel I am on the right track! This year has been about learning the ropes and I'm excited to see what this next year will bring!
• I became SAG eligible really fast-which was amazing as I worked very hard and even today I meet people all the time who have been here longer than me but haven't managed to become eligible yet so I definitely got lucky with that one which is great considering I didn't even know what it was when I arrived this time last year.
• The sunshine! though I haven't gotten to enjoy it as much as you might think (I spend a lot of my time inside freezing studios... why they feel a need to keep studios ice bucket cold I'll never know!). It's true it makes a difference to your mood waking up and there being good weather all the time! I've also developed a little beauty mark on my cheek that I don't think I had before.. if I did it's more noticeable now! Anyway developing a mark on your skin can be dangerous and I don't want anymore but I've always thought that they're cute! lol! so I don't mind it! 
• The house parties are incredible and on another level! From student accommodation at home to mansions up to the value of $85million here!! I feel so lucky just being there and it definitely makes you set higher ambitions for your own life! There's something to be said for seeing success with your own eyes! you become inspired!
• I'm definitely an outdoorsy person at heart and the weather here makes that very easy - along with the beautiful hikes, beaches and so much more to explore! 
• There's an endless amount of things to do here! 
• Living the set life can have its lows but it's also full of Adrenalin.. you never know what call is going to change your day or your life for that matter!

So to conclude this dramatic change of scenery hasn't been without it's challenges and I have certainly had days when I've thought "what the frig'am I doing!! where is my life going!!". It can be difficult getting on your feet: not only in the entertainment industry but also in your personal life and discovering both a new city and a new country! It can knock you down time and time again! However, when I realise that this time last year I prayed and wished for everything I have right now! and when I see proof that I am making progress and getting somewhere, when I meet people who I once could only look up to and realise success is attainable for me as well then it makes any of the bad times 100% worth it!! 

In 365 days I have accomplished things I once only dreamed! and I am confident in the fact that I am a much stronger, capable, happy and a more driven person than I ever realised! 

Fear of regret always outweighs fear of failure so if you're thinking of moving abroad or starting fresh with something - I say go for it! Chase your dreams whatever they may be!x! 

I am 1 year living in LA TODAY!!✨ just posted a blog on my experience so far! Check it out at www.shahirabarry.com (blog section) 😘🇺🇸🎉

A video posted by Shahira (@shahirabarry) on Aug 4, 2015 at 1:15am PDT

Follow me @ShahiraBarry on Instagram/twitter/facebook :* 

And subscribe to my YouTube channel if you haven't already! 

Lots of Love, 

Shahira Xo

If your company would like a review or specific blog-post on a product, treatment, service or any other item to appear on www.shahirabarry.com email info@shahirabarry.com with the details.

What is strobing? and how to do it VIDEO

Hey Blog Readers!

 

So I got around to making a new video for my YouTube channel and this time I decided to do a video on "strobing"! "What is it and How to do it!" so if you're interested give it a watch! and read on below for the strobing/highlighting products I use! 

 

Hope you enjoyed the video!x! 

Strobing Products used! 

So the highlighter I'm obsessed with at the moment is by Gerard Cosmetics, it's in their star powder range and it's called 'Marilyn'! Before now I always went for highlighters that were more on the silver side rather than gold but Marilyn is the most beautiful champagne gold colour and I think it would work well on any skin tone! I'm in love! It's perfect for summer and adds such a beautiful glow to the face! 

Both the product and packaging are of a very high end quality! I love the pigmentation, it's not too glittery but adds a natural beautiful glow, the staying power is amazing and also the packaging is both pretty yet handy! It's in a sleek gold case which contains a mirror for convenience and also a plastic covering which keeps the powder from braking (all powders should have this!) 

 

Gerard Cosmetics.com says "Marilyn was inspired by the ultimate blonde bombshell. A golden, luminous powder that is an ultra luxurious and creamy texture. Reminiscent of crush diamonds, this highlighter will be a girl's best friend"

There is 19% off Marilyn at the moment and add another 25% off with my discount code (Barry) and that's one hell of a discount! :) YAY :) 

Gerard cosmetics have a couple of different 'star powders' so there's bound to be one that catches your eye but for me 'Marilyn' is perfect for Summer-Strobing :) 

 

Another Gerard Cosmetics product that I included in my summer favorites recently is the BB+ Illumination cream! click here to read about it! 

And it is perfect for adding that summer glow, highlighting and strobing! I also use it on my body! (neck, shoulders, arms and shins!) 

See a full list of products used on my face in this video in the description for the video on YouTube

Strobing in full force... 

Remember to subscribe to my YouTube channel and give a thumbs up if you liked the video! 

You can also follow me @ShahiraBarry on Facebook/Instagram/Twitter and Snapchat!x! 

Remember if you shop Gerard Cosmetics .com to get your 25% discount with code 'Barry'

Lots of Love, 

Shahira Xo

If your company would like a review or specific blog-post on a product, treatment, service or any other item to appear on www.shahirabarry.com email info@shahirabarry.com with the details.

Everything happens for a reason???

Hey Blog Readers!

Random thoughts for you...

Do you ever look back at previous situations and just think as horrible as that was if that didn't happen to me, I didn't go through that, that person didn't treat me that way etc.. then I wouldn't be where I am today? I wouldn't have learnt what I now know and I wouldn't be the person I am...

I always believed that everything happened for a reason until I reached 18 and that's when I experienced my first real loss of a loved one.. that mind-frame can not possibly be put onto such a loss and it makes you question everything you believed before. So with the exception of loosing someone, horrible illnesses or accidents - take all of them out of the equation because I simply cannot include them. Lets just say when it comes to day to day life situations and experiences that you go through - whether bad or good I, at least, truly feel that they happen for a reason!

When you are in the middle of a negative situation it can be so hard to see beyond it, it can be so difficult to see what good will come of it.. but put it this way: think of something you went through; perhaps a fall out with friends: yes at the time it felt horrible but then a few months later look back at the situation - see where you are now and think would you be the same if that hadn't happened.. would you be in the same place? think of a relationship that went wrong and resulted in a nasty break-up.. would you have met the person you're now with? or if you have yet to meet someone would you have discovered yourself that little bit more the way you have - would you be who you are today?

Now I'm not saying that if you go around acting like a 'dick' and being nasty to your friends (for e.g.) (you being the cause of the fall out) that it's right to think "oh well everything happens for a reason, frig'apologizing, I'll learn from this in a few months" ha, no! if you think that's what I'm trying to say then you have me completely wrong! What I' trying to say is if you apply "everything happens for a reason" and think of situations where it has already come into play for you then life becomes easier and difficult situations become a little easier to handle. The pain is a lot less than if you didn't apply this idea and took a "woe is me" approach.

I have been thinking about this a lot lately... in terms of the things that have led me to this point in my life and the person who I am today! Granted I have not yet accomplished all of my goals or dreams or done everything in life that I have ever wanted to do (I'm in my early 20's how could I have). Even when I do accomplish current goals/dreams I'm sure new ones will be set and it will be a never ending task until the day I am no longer here on this earth (what a scary thought that is) but I am very confident in the fact that I feel I am on the right track and I am exactly where I should be for this moment in my life. There is something very comforting about that feeling. Don't get me wrong I am impatient at times and I think - I should be doing this that and the other, why hasn't this happened yet etc... but all I can do is trust that I am where I am supposed to be, that everything does happen for a reason and that my life is perfectly imperfect :)

YOU are also exactly where you should be! and if you feel you are not, you still are, even if it's simply the time to make you think this is not "where I want to be", to realise that, and decide to make a change in your life. If you are unhappy you can change it around and take your life in another direction whatever right now may be saying to you it is still this moment in your life that has made you discover what you need to know for the future and your past experiences that have molded you into the person you are right now and taught you the lessons you were destined to learn.

Food for thought :) 

Lots of love,

Shahira xo 

If your company would like a review or specific blog-post on a product, treatment, service or any other item to appear on www.shahirabarry.com email info@shahirabarry.com with the details.

sorry I was away for awhile... + 5 tips on staying positive in a negative situation

HEY Blog Readers! 

It's been a long time since I've posted on here so if you keep up with my blog regularly - apologies :)

April flew by for me! My mum visited me over the Easter holidays (yay) and then I moved apartment!! FINALLY!!! :)

I know some of you may have caught on to the fact that I was very unhappy in my old living situation = absolute nightmare! I had great hopes for it at the beginning... it was right by Runyon and I love to hike and do yoga so that was a huge plus! but lets just put it this way: what is having a beautiful home if you live in an absolute nightmare and ultimately a prison like situation of eating in your room to avoid negativity..but the energy would seep through anyway it could and it was ridiculously draining and horrible to live in! I would go to set happy and find myself crying on the return home and shaking with anxiety. I can honestly say I have never felt evilness towards me like I did over the past few months of being in that living space. For now I don't want to reflect on it too much because it was one of the worst experiences of my life and I'm still not fully over it.

I'm not really a believer in "everything happens for a reason"... I used to be but with time and loosing loved ones too soon etc.. it can be difficult to believe in that saying! However, what I will say, is that perhaps "some people come into your life as blessings while others come in as lessons" and for that maybe everyone who enters your life does come into it for a reason - be it good or bad! I am out of pocket thousands of dollars due to maliciousness + the move itself however I do believe that sometimes it is better to cut your losses and walk away...which is what I've done. I believe in Karma and also that the money I lost will come back to me in abundance. What I can say is that I am finally back to myself! It was only after the move that I realized I hadn't been myself in a long time as I was being drained daily with the stress of returning home. It's a difficult one to explain in writing especially when I don't want to go into it too much right now: I'm sure my posts over the past few months have been very confusing because on one hand I absolutely love LA and professionally things have been flying for me!! Actually, personally as well! Life could not be better in so many ways but I had this one negative thing in my life that was impossible to ignore because I was living in the situation! So it really was a time of Black and White!

ANYWAY!! I am glad to report that I am now in such a better headspace and I am back on my A-game! I moved from the Hollywood area to the Beverly Hills area and no offence at all to anyone who lives in Hollywood but I am seriously loving BHills and the West LA area so much more! My reason for this is as a young female from another country my new area feels so much safer and also a lot more community orientated which is what I am used to from home! I grew up in a small town and while I love the big city life I felt Hollywood lacked community and everything was very spread out.
I think it's easy to get stuck in one area and even one building! I had been coming to LA since 2012 and I always stayed in Hollywood - so it was what I knew! The building I moved into in October had a roof top pool with a great view and a gym so they were huge selling points for me and I thought I wouldn't find anywhere else to match but it just so happens my new place also has a rooftop with a great view + a much bigger pool, Jacuzzi and gym! not to mention my apartment is about x5 the size (as is my walk-in!) I am beyond HAPPY :) I also feel a lot stronger and wiser! perhaps I've learnt a harsh lesson about life and people that I needed to learn in order to make myself more capable at handling the big bad world that we live in! Life is good again and I'm excited for the future!x!

In other news.. 

 I'm trying to start daily meditation. A friend recently told me about an app called 'headspace' which is basically guided meditation and the idea is to start with 10 minutes a day for 10 days! I've always liked the idea of meditation but I truly had no idea how to do it as my mind is on constant over drive at all times! so I believe guided meditation is definitely the way forward for me! I will let you know how I get on with it! I told my mum about it and she's been giving it a go and seems to really like it!

I went to Vegas for my birthday at the end of April! I was invited on a comped-weekend at the SLS hotel & casino: It was AMAZING! we had a group of 35 girls and we had an absolute ball!! it was the best way to spend my birthday!x! We ate dinner at Katsuya (OMG I'm a sushi convert!mmm), partied at Life and Hyde nightclubs(at Hyde we had THE best table in the house with a backdrop of the famous Bellagio fountains(amazing) and attended the Foxtail pool party. I love going away and celebrating somewhere new for my bday! It started with London for my 21st and now I think I'll make it a yearly thing! As they say "possessions have a price but travel and experiences don't".

Last week I worked on a video for rapper Hopsin - I'm ashamed to say I didn't know his music beforehand but mannn I've had him on repeat ever since: serious talent! so If you're like me and have been living under a rock look him up ;)

Pics from life recently... (Pstttt follow meee @ShahiraBarry on instagram, facebook and twitter)

Finally to end this blog I'm going to give you guys 5 tips on staying positive in a negative situation (these really helped me when I was in negativity)

1. Have a positive support group! 

It is so important to find a positive support group to help each other through difficult times! It doesn't matter if this is 100 people, 5 people or one person! Surrounding yourself with positive people will help you to stay positive when in a negative situation! I have made some lovely friends here in LA who I feel very fortunate to have met but three people worth an extra mention are Kelsey, Shane and Yasmin (all of whom just so happen to be Irish, lol) but when I felt I couldn't bare my old living environment anymore they took me in while my new place wasn't ready and kept a smile on my face the entire time! I was really lucky to have them and don't know what I would have done without them! of course there was(as always)also the support of my mum and sister! My mum actually flew to LA to help me get out of my old apartment! now that's love! even though this visit did slightly stir the pot and put a fire under the situation - it was ultimately a good one because it led to me getting out of there permanently!

 

    2. Express what you are grateful for! 

Even in the worst of times there are always things in our lives to be grateful for! Voice those blessings! Actively acknowledging what you are grateful for will help you to always have a grateful mind and heart even when bad things happen. I say at least three things I am grateful for from that day to myself every night before I go to sleep! some days it's harder to think of things but there is ALWAYS something so don't overlook it!x!

     3. Retrain your mind! 

It can be easy to let negativity consume you but the more you let that happen the more it will become a part of you! Instead practice the power of positive thinking! If a negative thought enters your mind replace it with a positive one!

      4. Exercise your body and mind! 

We all know that exercise is good for our bodies but it is also great for the mind! It's no joke that it releases the "happy hormone". It helps our body to release endorphins that make us feel better! Exercise truly has physical, emotional and mental benefits! It can be hard to find the will power to get up and do it but once you do you'll be so glad you did! I also like to add yoga to my weekly routine to help me focus and relax.

       5. Accept and find solutions

Many of us are resistant to change but we must learn to accept that change will happen. Remember "the only constant in life is change". If you are unhappy with something see it as an opportunity to make a change.

Lots of Love

Shahira Xo 

If your company would like a review or specific blog-post on a product, treatment, service or any other item to appear on www.shahirabarry.com email info@shahirabarry.com with the details.